The egoist

A childhood of thoughtfulness,
A teenage of desparation,
A Life of loneliness.

A hope of exhilaration,
A Desire of capturing the moment,
A lost shadow of time,
A new life of mine,
A flickering thought of time,
A new vain for life.

A new month of winter,
A life-thrilling Christmas.

A day of decision,
A choice of relaxation.

A choice of a career,
A doubt of a life.

A road all-alone,
A light offered alone,
A choice again,
A deep thought of eager.

A tender support,
A major doubt.

A confusion,
A conclusion.

A right,
A left,
A decision all-alone to be taken.

A dark road traveled alone,
A prophetic hand of my own.

A reflection of a shadow in water,
A shadow lost in the skies.

A soul seeking rest,
A heart sending love.

A Thought to be shared,
A empty sky to hear.

A life lived in ego,
A life lived in ego.

ECSTACY

DRONING CLASSES..................TO BUNK
AN OLD GUITAR.......................TO PUNK
STYLING GEL.................... LIFE IS HELL
CHEESECAKES & A.......PERFECT HUNK.

SWEET OBLIVION.......MORPHINE-KICK
BITTERLY NUMB................ANESTHETIC
VOCAL SILENCE......ARCANE VIOLENCE
MILLION OPTIONS.........HARD TO PICK.

BROKEN LOVE..............ANOTHER DAME
BOOBY TRAP.......................FATAL GAME
HAND IN HAND...............IN QUICKSAND
EYES HAV CHANG’D......WORLD’S SAME.

Can't have you

I’m done for
looped in one go
could barely fly
oh how i hate you so

frustration grips my throat
shrieking in my ear
crazed and compulsive
becoming my fear

hidden behind a shield
you grin and tease
know you’r unreachable
doing as you please

i can't swipe at you
or grab you from the sky
flying in my thoughts
you almost make me cry

running around in circles
trying to catch you
while you drift on and on
over a cloud or two

i'm so corrupted
and i'm so torn
reaching out for you
from dusk till dawn

like a porcelain sky
you seem so pure
fear to touch you
feel so unsure

my touch will taint you
and you'll no longer shine
so i'll stay in the shadows
cuz you'll never be mine

Wonder why

Wonder why, why I can’t sleep at night,
Wonder why, why I can’t feel my life,
Wonder what, Is it that pains so much,
So much, that it hurts to breath,
Wonder why, Do we still go on,
Go on with all the lies, all the pretense,
Whom are we lying to?
Is it the others around us?
Or to ourselves, Life.. What is it after all?
The acceptance of this pretence?
Which with the pain brings the joy,
This is what we are told, from as long as I remember,
The real joy, The joy which gives the others around me joy..
But isn’t the pain which I feel by this acceptance,
More killing then the joy which I give to others..
I hope I keep wondering, Cause it scares me,
That one day, I will accept, accept the pretence,
And then I won’t ask again,
Then everyone around me will be joyous,
Except me,
So I keep on wondering….

Sleep-walking back again

Dusty wind rushing, gushing hard his blow,
Spilling out sulky heat, the pulpy sun glow,
Through the motor stunk, the stuffed lane row,
Into the murky snug, where life gaze sorrow.

Resting on the roof, his tiring eyes droop,
As chinks in his little life, does his mind swoop:

No Lap to sleep and bent back to leap,
Nor a mercy heart that loves him deep,
No soul to play with, to pump his bliss,
Nor a loving soul that hug him to kiss.

His little life crackled thus in a stony fate,
That plunged his arms away from the Slate.

Thoughts thus rustled him out of his doze,
As sudden a stirring thought does its rose.
Holding his Breath, the little lad yells:

“Oh dear, never feel orphaned, never again,
This earth so dear, laid you in her lap,
With you always, in your beautiful nap,
The cool breeze waft, kissing you soft,
Hugging you sweet, she swung you aloft,
Black lovely cloud drizzled you her Love,
As you play merry, with her colored bow.

Born to her, Mother Nature loves you so deep,
So never feel orphaned even when you sleep.”

His heart bore mettle, grew him into the great,
For had his chance, to checkmate his stony fate.

College days

When you have trudged the rugged miles,
and still you have miles to go....
With a bruised heart and a sore mind;
a mutilated self ready to blow.

A thousand fleeting thoughts of those dreamy-lands,
etched indelibly, yet a slave in chain.
Figments of imagination or a jocund real world
where thirty hearts shared joy and pain.

Poignant souls desperately seeking solace,
in the college days where fun never ran dry.
The journey that began 0n 4th July 2005 may end,
but memories remain: for friends never say goodbye..............